Why you need to block out the “Noise.”

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The other day I was having a conversation with a friend of mine. She was feeling a little bit down herself and disheartened because some of the people in her life were saying things to her that weren’t particularly supportive and in some ways kind of mean-spirited.

Throughout our lives, we are faced with many situations and people who say things that tear us down. Sometimes it’s the people who are closest to us and other times it’s strangers and people that we don’t know very well. There are times when the intention behind it isn’t necessarily coming from a malicious place, but the words still sting. And of course at other times, the person’s intention is to cut us, and boy do they ever.

Why you need to block out the "Noise." The importance of moving past the negativity and staying on your road to success.| The Life Jolie

Our conversation got me thinking of a book I read a number of years ago, A Place of Yes: 10 Rules for Getting Everything You Want Out of Life by Bethany Frankel. I have such love in my heart for Bethany. I really identify with her sarcastic sense of humor and outspoken, brash way of communicating. She is perfectly imperfect, she’s a brilliant business woman and she owns every bit of her personality, the good and the bad.

At one point in her book, Bethany brought up a very important point that stuck with me. Every day, all around us, there is noise. I’m not talking about sirens and horns and babies crying and people dog’s barking at absolutely nothing, as they tend to do (especially mine!).

The kind of noise that I’m talking about (and before me, that Bethany was talking about) is chatter from people around us. Specifically, negativity. Whether or not the original intention is malicious. There will always be noise– in our work life, social scenes, parent groups, PTA, sometimes even our family.

As they say, people always remember the negatives. This couldn’t be more applicable to noise. Because when this noise comes our way, it gets right into our heads and makes a comfy little home for itself where it silently eats away at all of the good, positive things going on up there and in our hearts. And in the worst cases, it does a charming little number where it takes us off course and derails us from the great road that we are on towards achieving our goals.

Think about it. How many times has someone made a comment in passing and for hours after that, you can’t seem to get those words out of your head. You begin second guessing things you did, your reactions to people in your life, the intentions of those around you. Every little thing. And that noise rattles around in your brain while you silently tear yourself down and feel worse and worse about yourself.

So when my friend mentioned these things that people had said that they were bringing her down, I immediately thought back to reading about noise. It made such a huge impact on me when first I read about it and for years it’s stuck with me because this concept is so right on target. Especially for my friend’s situation.

You guys, we have to block this noise out. It’s dangerous. Noise is a serious hazard and road block in our journey to where we need to be. And it’s hard! I know this all-too-well, because I am the ultimate over-analyzer! Yes, I’m admitting it right here, I’m totally neurotic and completely wound up. So I get it.

The noise is constantly buzzing and swirling around all of us. In taking myself out of it and looking at it from a big picture perspective, it actually makes me pretty sad. People in general spend so much time tearing each other down. Sometimes, we don’t even realize we’re doing it. I know I’m guilty of it myself. It’s definitely an area that I’m working on being better with. From giving standpoint, I’m trying to be more mindful of the things I say, what they bring to the conversation and how they might be interpreted.

But seriously, when it comes to the noise that is thrown at us from other people, it is so important not to get sucked in. You have to put your proverbial ear plugs in, get those blinders on and keep moving forward. Because listening to that noise and letting it tear you down is not contributing anything to your journey.

People will say what they want to say. There is absolutely nothing you can do to stop them. You can’t control what other people say. What you can control is yourself and how you react. Will it sting sometimes? Yes. Will it ruin your day (or life)? That’s up to you. It doesn’t have to. Know yourself well enough and believe that you are a good person and focus on the road ahead. Keep sending out the positivity and it’s bound to come back to you. And these inevitable times when it doesn’t? Too bad. Block out the noise and move forward, it’s just not worth your time.

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14 Comments

  • Reply
    heather
    September 4, 2015 at 12:37 pm You are spot on! I have had to remove some negative people from my life lately, and although it hurt at first, it really was a welcome change in my overall attitude. heather recently posted...From The FarmMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 2:10 pm Yeah, sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do!
  • Reply
    Emily
    September 4, 2015 at 5:26 pm Glad it's not just me! Emily recently posted...How to Sell on MercariMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 2:09 pm It's definitely me too!
  • Reply
    KC the Kitchen Chopper
    September 4, 2015 at 8:44 pm This advice is so simple, yet it is so difficult to follow through with it. It takes practice to "just let it go". I do try to do this. Like you said, it's just not worth the time. KC the Kitchen Chopper recently posted...Red Pepper, Asparagus, Egg, Cheesy, Brown Rice Scramble ChoppedMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 2:08 pm It is SO hard no matter how confident you are or how positive!
  • Reply
    Sandra - The Foodie Affair
    September 5, 2015 at 12:46 am I have someone working temporarily for me right now that came with a black cloud, and I refuse to get sucked into negativity. Every time he says something gloom and doom I come back with something positive. I'm probably annoying the heck out of him - haha! Sandra - The Foodie Affair recently posted...Parmesan Roasted CauliflowerMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 2:08 pm Oh man, it's so hard when it's at work! Good for you for keeping things positive!
  • Reply
    Katerina
    September 5, 2015 at 2:21 am It's true people will say things whatever you do. I always try to evaluate what i hear and judge if they are right or wrong. Usually I trust a few people and evaluate their opinions, all the others just don't matter! Katerina recently posted...Choco-Tahini SpreadMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 2:08 pm It really is true- kind of a bummer but I think you go about it in a great way!
  • Reply
    Marjie@homeagainjiggetyjig.com/wp
    September 5, 2015 at 3:13 am I've also found that taking time to follow these Bible verses makes all the difference in blocking out the noise! "Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." Philippians 4:8 Marjie@homeagainjiggetyjig.com/wp recently posted...THE BEST THINGS TO BUY IN SEPTEMBERMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 12:13 pm Awesome! It's all about doing what you need to do to block that noise out!
  • Reply
    Betsy @ Desserts Required
    September 5, 2015 at 1:20 pm You are so on point here that it is scary!! Life is just too darn short to get sucked into the noise and sometimes we need reminders of why this is true. Thank you! Betsy @ Desserts Required recently posted...Chocolate Mint Bundt CakeMy Profile
    • Reply
      Jessy
      September 8, 2015 at 11:15 am I agree- it really is!

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